Music Review: Elliott Carter at The Miller Theater
by Britney
Hey y’all…So, I like…went to this music thing up ‘t that Columbia school…and like…it was actually real cool…even though at first ah was like…huh?…but then later it was like…okay…
So there’s this old guy Elliott…and he’s like, real old, and it was like his birthday an’ at the end, we even got to sang Happy Birthday for him…And he was like so cute and sweet, y’all, it was like…the cutest thing…I ain’t jokin’ neither…You just want to like…put him on yer lap or somethin’…
Inyways…there was like…some instrumental solos at the beginning…well, like one solo and then some other songs with more instruments in ‘em…like instruments I never seen before…Well…the solo was like this violin thing…and…he played like real fast…and I don’t know if there was a melody or nothin’…but it was cool, I guess…He kept doin’ this one thing where he would like, pluck the strings with the same hand he was using to hit the notes?…I don’t know what that’s called, but it was like seriously cool…
So after that…this guy ‘n this girl come out…and the girl had a flute, I know that, ‘n the guy had this black thing, like a flute, I guess, but he held it differnt…and when one of them played like…a really long note, the other one would like, play a lot a other notes…’n then sometimes they would play the same note but right after one another, like back when we was kids, ma mamma used to call that a hocket…or somethin’ like that…’n there was this real pretty part when like, they did this really pretty leap frog thing, ‘n the notes just kept gettin’ higher ‘n higher…’N like, the music kinda sounded like people talkin’?…like words or something…which was funny cuz then there was all these words in the program talkin’ about the music!…
Oh! ‘N I forgot to tell you that there were like, traffic things…what’d’you call ‘em?…dividers or somethin’, all over the stage and kinda turned over…and I was like, What?, but then later I was like, Oh, okay, I git it…
So then…two more folks come out…One of ‘em had like a big violin, but it didn’t quite sound like a violin…like…it was lower?…’n the other had this big curvy wood thing..kinda like a rain stick that you get in the mawl…but…not as pretty, I guess…but the violin thing would like, get all mad ‘n stuff cuz the rain stick thing was like fartin’ or something…I not kiddin’, that’s what it sounded like!…like little farts comin’ out of it’s poop hole!…It was kind cute I guess…Oops! I just did one! Sorry, y’all!…Shut up...You know you like ma’ farts!…
Inyways…then like, three folks come out…’n I’m like, What’s next? A hunderd?…But they like really rehearsed the comin and goin’ so like, all them transitions looked really professional and stuff…But so ‘n they come out and it’s like a violin, that black flute thing, ‘n then this crotch fiddle…well, that’s what daddy use ta call it, but I think it’s really called a cello or something like that…So they were like really interestin’ to watch cuz their bodies like, really got into it and stuff…like, you could see how the music was makin’ their bodies do all sorts of funny moves…one would like dip his head down ‘n the other would like pop her hand up in the air ‘n all…and, you know, I can totally feel that, cuz that’s what it’s like to perform my songs and stuff, you know, on stage…like, the music’s inside you, and it’s what’s pushing your butt forward…You know what I mean?…Inyway, I was also like…you could tell that the music was like, divided even between ‘em…like the little old composer dude was tryin’a balance ‘em out and stuff…An’…an’ it sounded like he did a pretty good job to me…you know…like they all had just the right amount of stuff to play…Shut up…I am not a nerd!…I just like music an’ all…I’m a musician, retard…I may not be able to play a rain stick, but I know a good song when I hear one…
So then like six or seven people come out…and one guy was like, in charge of all the others…and there was like a harp…like the old fashoined kind you see in the Disney movies…and there was like a bugle…Oh! an’ a guitar…an’…an’…like this keyboard thing that you hit with sticks…I don’t know what it’s called, but it like made this wobbly kinda sound when you hit it…and there was this like…little guitar that you see in old pain’in’s and stuff…Oh and there was that slidy horn thing, with the arm that goes down and up?…and it’s kinda big?…Inyways…their music was real pretty…and like, the slidy horn thing and the bugle would go like…“Wonk!”…and then the guitars and the harp would just start freakin’ out, but real pretty like…I don’t know…it sounded kinda French…and then the guitar dude had like this long solo near the end, and it was kinda like the other players just kinda worked around him, you know, like my dancers do when I’m like, doin’ somethin’ real cool on my own…so they were like…really workin’ together and stuff…and…I don’t know…there wasn’t like a melody or nothin…but…somethin’ about it was real cool…
So then it was like half time…and I had one of the Papz run across the street ‘n git me some Parliaments…and there was like, no bar, so I had him git me a Mountain Dew too…But then the usher dudes wouldn’t let me take ‘em inside the theater, so I had to like, drink it all real fast, and then I like, let out this totally huge nasty burp, which was like, so embarrassing, ‘n all…but whatever…I’m not perfect y’all…
Iiiinways…so like…the second part was like this opera thing the little old composer dude just made like, I don’t know, ten years ago or something….Oh!…An’ I remember it’s name…What Next? was what it’s called…An’ when we come back from half time, there were like these two white walls that were snakin’ onto the stage…n’ they were made outta tiles an’ stuff and it kinda looked like a tunnel or somethin’…and there were more a them traffic thingies…and there was two yella stripes runnin’ down the middle a’ the floor…so I guess it was a tunnel…and then them singers come out and get ready…An’ one of ‘em like, laid back across one of them plastic things…an’ one of ‘em was this cute little kid…
So…then we hear all this racket…like clinkin’ and clankin’ sounds comin’ from somewhere, but I couldn’t see any people playin’ nothin’…so I don’t know where it’s comin’ from…but it sounded like metal parts and stuff…I don’t know…like drums made outta metal…or somethin’…anyway…then folks started singin’…and some of ‘em had pretty good voices…like real trained voices, like that opera scene in Pretty Woman…but, I don’t know, I wasn’t cryin’ or nothin’…
So there wasn’t like a story or anything…I mean…not normal an’ all…but I git that these like, six folks just got in a car accident…But the program was like “There has been an accident of some kind,” and I was like, Some kind? What’d’ya mean “some kind”? It’s like a car accident!…I mean, I been in one a them…I know what it’s like…So like…the people are all walkin’ around kinda confused like…which I can relate with cuz that’s what happens when you git into an accident, it’s like, you don’t know where you are or nothin’…and everything seems, like…fake…or something…
And they were all singing funny words written by this one guy…cuz I guess the little old dude who wrote the music wasn’t s’posed to write the words too…so the lyrics were like…kinda weird…sorta like you think a poem would sound like…but, I don’t know…it was kinda hard to follow…but luckily they decided to show the words on the walls so’s we could understand ‘em, cuz sometimes with the singin’ an’ all, that can be hard…
And then, I don’t know who the choreographer was, but like, everything was like…real slow…like the singin’ folks were just takin’ lots of time to go from one place to another…and I was just like, you know, these people should prob’ly move a lot a more cuz they’re all freakin out from the accident and stuff…
Then this pretty lady with big hair started to sing a lot…and she had a real hot voice and all…and the kid just sat there playin’ his gameboy, what was kinda funny, and he sang some…But you know, it didn’t sound like the composer man was like, comfortable with the words an’ all…you know, like…like his songs just kinda did their own thing, an’…there just happened to be words too…Do you know what I mean?…It was kinda like…the lyrics and the music didn’t really go together…kinda like Alanis Morisette…I mean, I like her, but sometime’s y’can’t tell from what she’s sayin!…
Also, y’all…like…all the singers seemed really mad at each other…like they didn’t like each other…and I was like, Come on, y’all…If we were all just in an accident together, we’d prob’ly help each other out ‘n stuff…But like, these two guys…one of ‘em had a real low voice and one of ‘em sang higher…but they kept like, tryin’ to touch the girls and stuff, and I was like, Eeeeww, gross!…Why would they do that?…It just didn’t make sense…
At one point…most the singers, but the kid, had left…and there were like, all these happy chords in the music..but they were like…I don’t know…in different places, so they sounded kinda spooky together…like they didn’t belong together…but it was still kinda pretty…Then the folks come back and they all like went crazy an’ a them started drawin’ all over the walls with a pin…and this one lady started pourin’ confetti out of her purse…it was like some kinda orgy or somethin’…Then there was like this really loud part, and they were like singin’…“Do I really love you?”…which I thought was cool, cuz you know, when that shit happens like a car accident and stuff you really start to think about what’s impordent in yer life, and sometimes you’re not sure if you love the people you say you love, which is like, totally what happened between K-Fed ‘n me…’n we were like, Oh…Maybe we don’t love each other…which was really sad cuz we had kids ‘n all…
Well inyways…Near the end…these like, construction workers come out…and they’re like moving real slow…like slow motion…which was kinda lame, but, I guess these people‘re suppose’ta be dead…and like the construction workers are ignorin’ ‘em…but what was weird was that…like…The singers were ignorin’ the construction workers too!…I’m serious, they were just singing to the audience, and I was like…Don’t look at ME, y’all! Look at THEM! They’re the ones what can help you!…So that didn’t really make sense to me…An’ another funny thing was that, like…the words started to get more real…and they kinda sounded funny…like two of ‘em suddenly thought they were like in love and stuff…and one of ‘em was gonna have a baby an’ all…and…I was like…it could have been real funny, but someone told ‘em to act like real serious and stupid…so like…it was just kinda weird…and I thought, you know…it could have been real fun and all….but I guess this opera stuff is supposed to be real serious and make you cry and stuff…
Well…I didn’t cry…an’ it’s not like it was bad or anything…but…I don’t know…I just woulda liked there to be more fun stuff…cuz there’s like a whole stage and music and things and…you could totally do so much more with all that…you know?…
Okay, y’all…my typin’ piggies are tired out…I’m gonna sign off now…but keep readin’ my blog ‘n all…’N sorry agin’ about the VMAs!…I promise y’all that next time I’ll be back and for realz…I promise…Thanks for all your love ‘n support ‘n presents…I’m just a little girl from the South tryin’ to make it in the world…
Peace out, y’all…
xxooxxoxoxBrit
“Fantasy–Remembering Roger” performed by David Fulmer, violin
“Esprit Rude/Esprit Doux played by Alexandra Sopp, flute; Gilad Harel, clarinet
“Au Quai” performed by Justin Brown, bassoon; Nadia Sirota, viola
“Con leggerezza pensosa–Omaggio a Italo Calvino” performed by Stephen Zielinski, clarinet; Keats Dieffenbach, violin; Clarice Jensen, cello
“Luimen” performed by Michael Blutman, trumpet; Nicholas Hagen, trombone; Alexander Lipowski, vibraphone; Joseph Brent, mandolin; Bill Anderson, guitar; Bridget Kibbey, harp; Jeffrey Milarsky, conductor
What Next?
Music by Elliott Carter
Libretto by Paul Griffiths
Christopher Alden, director
Jeffrey Milarsky, conductor
Andrew Cavanaugh, scenic designer
Amanda Squitieri, soprano
Morgan Smith, barintone
Susan Narucki, soprano
Matthew Garrett, tenor
Katherine Rohrer, mezzo soprano
Jonathan Makepeace, boy alto
Roadworkers, James Michael Zally, E.C. Kelly
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